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 my big day was supposed to start off with a trip to knott's berry farm... |
 but the penny-pinching mo-fo's closed the park due to "inclimate weather" - i guess blue skies, sunshine and white puffy clouds are dangerous for roller coaster riders.... |
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 so we broke in and TRASHED the place!! |
 "once... twice... three times a lady..." |
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 sons of bitches... muther f*cking sons of bitches.. |
 snoopy looks on in horror as i brutally beat and sodomize one of his employees |
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 so off we went to the racetrack... i should have brought my motion-sickness pills |
 speedy Cheryl takes the lead ... |
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 my driving skills reigned supreme on the slick track as i bumped all competition out of the way! |
 i rammed dale's back end and put him out of commision for a while... |
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 was this the first, second or third time cheryl BEAT DALE'S ASS in the drag race? |
 aaawwww yeeaahh... we hit the dance machine for some foot stompin' beats! |
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 K-dunk-a-dunk and C-master Hey-Hey be flashin they signs... |
 with my whitey-inspired rhythm and dale's white man's overbite, we were an unstoppable pair... |
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 (...ok i'm sorry... how friggin cute do i look in this picture?..) |
 kendra shows off her finest JT move (that's "Justin Timberlake" for those of you who don't have your fingers on the pulse of what rocks America) |
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 oh we were dope dancin' solo... |
 but all heads turned when we teamed up to bring the hiz-ouse down with our funky-fly-fresh moves |
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 ...someone's gotta show 'em how it's done... |
 here's where things started to get ugly... |
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 oh yeah. it was a danceoff, ladies and gentlemen.. |
 we stretch to get ready for our pumpin moves... |
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 "WHUU..? |
 "Bitch, pleeeze"... "WHA-EVA" |
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 what's a birthday without a bloody fight over a BJ's pizzookie? |
 cameltoe, anyone? |
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